???

Why did he choose you as his wife? If it was "love" as it's understood by Westerners, then what was it about you that caused him to "fall in love"? If it was a little bit of that, and other things, what were the other things? Whatever it was that he liked about you, those reasons are still present.

And if the only thing that could have given him "marital bliss" was marrying a young, untouched virgin, then why did he use the Internet message board to find a wife?

What I mean is this: there were things about you he *liked*. Those things are still "you" even though you have "a past," as have all of us beyond the age of ... hmm.... twelve? If virginity is the *only* thing, perhaps he should divorce you and then bring over an Indian teenager to marry. Hopefully he'll have her checked by a doctor before signing the marriage license.

You did let him know you were "non-traditional" and had had boyfriends before. That should have been enough. Is it the abortion that's upsetting him?

You know, I hate to bring this up, but something else occurs to me.

He wouldn't be one of these guys who marries a woman and then gets his mother to douse her with kerosene so she can set the bride on fire in order to collect the insurance or keep the dowry? Because that's what it's sounding like to me: it sounds like there's something very twisted going on here with him. Ok, he didn't "know everything", but I thought you told him you weren't a virgin. Was *he* a virgin? If not, then ask him to give you some solid reasons for expecting it of you and not of himself. There is psychological bride-burning going on here. I suggest you see a counselor (and stay away from flammable materials).
 

Hi, I am someone who can completely relate to what you are going through. I'm still hiding the truth but I'm scared that one day my husband will find out & my marriage will be over.